degster: "I hope I'll be able to play in tier one. I don't know what's going to happen"

"I just hope I'll get the chance, and if I do, I'll do my best to keep performing," the PGL Bucharest MVP added.

Falcons arrived at PGL Bucharest as a dead roster, expected to dispense with Abdul "⁠degster⁠" Gasanov at any moment after the Romanian event with reports linking the Saudi organization to a blockbuster deal for Ilya "⁠m0NESY⁠" Osipov.

An 0-2 start in the tournament's Swiss group stage, including a disastrous 3-26 loss to GamerLegion, had all but sealed this roster's fate, but a resurgent showing from degster led a recovery effort past the likes of The MongolZ, FaZe, and G2 to earn the Saudi organization its first LAN trophy.

The Russian sniper recovered from a disastrous start to the tournament (0.64 rating over five maps) and ended it as the MVP, averaging a 1.27 rating over the last 12 maps in a display of exceptional mental fortitude.

He ended an eight-year hunt for a trophy, knowing he is headed for the door with an uncertain future, but was happy he managed to share the moment with his teammates before leaving.

"Last year was really tough for me," he told HLTV after receiving his MVP award. "I don't want to cry here, but when you're not winning so much and you put in as much work as I do, it becomes a really tough challenge inside of you to keep saying to yourself, 'Yes, I'm going to get. Yes, it's going to be here.'

"I was starting to doubt a lot of things when we didn't win the grand finals with HEROIC, and I'm just so happy, and I appreciate that I did it with these guys. It means a lot."

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We're here with first-time champion and first-time MVP degster. Tell me your first thoughts after this final and getting your first MVP.

It feels amazing. The way the tournament started, you don't expect that you're even going to go to the playoffs. It's a tough challenge to go out with 13-1, 13-2, matches like that, where you can't even get a good amount of rounds, and then you also hear the rumors. Everyone was asking how I felt. Some people started to message me with how I should play the game and stuff like that, so I decided not to listen to them and just focus on myself and try to do what was best for me.

Everyone was asking: 'How is your mental, are you fine? Are you fine? Are you fine?' And this question just got boring for me. I just started to be more inside of myself and tried to do my best because for me, the most important thing was not to play for myself, just to play the game, and that was the most important.

Right now I'm feeling amazing, I already said that this isn't the thing I expected to happen — getting your first trophy in your career and also getting the MVP. That's like a small dream for me that I achieved right now. I'm overexcited right now. I have so many emotions inside of me; I can't easily explain them, but I'm happy right now. That's the moment of happiness in life that I'll try to enjoy right now. There are some other things happening, but I'll try to enjoy. That's the most important thing for me right now.

You started 0-2 here, lost a game with only three rounds in two maps. How did you cancel the noise outside and refocus? How did the team come together and get things to click to go on this great streak all the way to the final, which you won 3-0?

zonic did a good job in terms of talks for the team. I can tell you, honestly, in my personal expectations and feelings, what I remember from these games... I was fine. It was a bit rough, honestly, but it was not like my mental was going down. People were asking me about that, and I was like, 'I cannot answer you, but I'm fine.'

The thing is, I think zonic did a really good job. I appreciate that because after what he did and what he said, we started to work. We started to understand. We took small steps each game from one to another, and we started to improve, and we ended up being really confident in the way we played the game. That's amazing, to be honest.

When we saw how the semi-finals were lining up, a lot of people wanted to see that Falcons vs. G2. How was it for you, knowing you were going to face m0NESY?

We're all humans, yes? Sometimes these types of thoughts get into your head. I know that even in my region, there are a lot of people who like Ilya [m0NESY], and I can understand and respect that.

There were some thoughts, yeah. Like, 'This is the guy that's replacing me,' and stuff like this, but in the end, I was just trying to focus on the game because I do believe, at least for myself... When I saw that we're playing G2 in the grand final, I didn't want to think about, 'Is that the first trophy that I'm going to get it?' Or 'I'm playing against m0NESY now, he's one of the best players in the world.'

For me, the most important thing was just to play the game. I even said that to the guys. We had one thing... I hope my teammates will understand. We said, 'Let's do it for Abdul.' And I said, 'No, let's not do it for me.' I just want us to win. Let's just play the game.

I don't want to hear that we're doing it for someone. We all deserve it. I love every one of them, no matter the situation in the end, and I appreciate that they will always be a part of my history now, and a part of my life. I just wanted to win, but not be overexcited or try to prove something to someone. That's not the way I want to live my life.

That's a great end to one story, but there's also a new beginning. You couldn't have have ended better, so what do you hope comes next?

I hope I'll be able to play in tier one, honestly. I don't know what's going to happen. I wasn't talking with anyone. I put myself aside from social media in a way that I would never talk with someone while playing a tournament. I didn't read some of the messages and stuff like this. I just hope I'll get the chance, to be honest, and if I get it, I'll do my best to keep performing.

Right now, I think I played well. I can't say I'm blaming myself for anything right now. There were mistakes, of course, but overall, I did my best. I tried to help the team in any possible way, and I just hope that I'll have a chance to keep working, and I want to see where I get with that work this year.

You were telling me about how it has been eight years of grinding ever since you moved on your own at 15, chasing a dream. Finally, you got at least a bit of that dream, winning a trophy and an MVP. What does it mean in the context of the grind you've been on?

It means a lot for me. I had like three or four grand finals in the past seven or eight months, and it was really important to get something out of it. Honestly, I can tell you that I didn't believe that this is the moment. Of course, when you're in the grand final, it's not that I didn't believe here that we could win, but it means a lot.

Eight years is a huge amount of time and I was sometimes thinking that there were younger players winning trophies and I'm not. There were questions like that there's maybe something wrong in me. Maybe I'm not doing something well, or I need to work on something else, and stuff like that.

Last year was really tough for me. I don't want to cry here, but when you're not winning so much and you put in as much work as I do, it becomes a really tough challenge inside of you to keep saying to yourself, 'Yes, I'm going to get. Yes, it's going to be here.' After seven years, any human is going to doubt himself. 'Are you good for it? Are you deserving it?' Even though I know I put in a lot of work.

I was starting to doubt a lot of things when we didn't win the grand finals with HEROIC, and I'm just so happy, and I appreciate that I did it with these guys. It means a lot; I won't lie. It means a lot. Right now, I'm feeling that I'm super calmed down, but inside of me, there are so many emotions of happiness, and I just feel like I'm out of it. My limits of emotions are somewhere in the sky.

I'll let you go celebrate in a moment, but before that, one last thing. You speak of having those moments of doubt. Does winning here help you move forward? Does it give you that extra motivation, especially now that it'll maybe be a bit more uncertain while you see what's next?

It's definitely helping me and giving me extra motivation because I'm not the person — at least from what I know about myself... I didn't achieve the success of winning a trophy or getting an MVP in my career until today, but previously, no matter what result I got, I always kept going forward because I do know that yes, I was missing this feeling when you finish the tournament and you know that you're the best here.

But right now I know that there are a lot of people working to get this trophy at the next tournament and that gives me a lot of motivation to keep working because I know, I like these words, that while you're chilling, there's someone else who is working and waiting for that opportunity to get the trophy and be the best team in the world, be the best player in the world.